Four years ago today we had been told that William had critical aortic valve stenosis.
It was a discovery by accident.
The neonatologist had come to us and said his heart was not beating properly but that they would give him medication to fix it. We had experienced a wonderful day with William awake and responding. I […]
Posted on April 6th, 2008 by Tiff
Filed under: Loss of a baby, Love, grief, hurting | 17 Comments »
I never asked that he be saved, that we be spared the awfulness of his death.
I had not prayed in such a long time but when I did; when I finally closed my eyes and spoke to whoever that higher power is, I asked for strength and peace to get me through what needed to be […]
Posted on April 4th, 2008 by Tiff
Filed under: Loss of a baby, grief, hurting | 12 Comments »
Dear William,
Wow, you’re four years old. Where has that time gone? It has disappeared into the days, months, years since you came and left. Five days is not alot to have you in my life but they are five days I will cherish forever.
It’s hard to imagine what you would look like now, although when I look […]
Posted on April 3rd, 2008 by Tiff
Filed under: Loss of a baby, Love, grief | 15 Comments »
April 2nd is always going to be a big day. It should be. It’s our son’s birthday.
After alot of worry and tears we settled on a late lunch on the beach. We had a cake and we sang happy birthday to our angel boy.
It was sweet.
He made his presence felt with the very low fly […]
Posted on April 2nd, 2008 by Tiff
Filed under: Loss of a baby, celebrations!, family, grief | 14 Comments »
Four candles should burn brightly today in celebration.
The soft glow enveloping your small, pale face and big blue eyes. Filled with wonder and a new understanding. Of birthdays and life and all the important things, like snails and mud and which brand of Peanut Butter you like better and whether Captain Feathersword is funnier than Wags The Dog.
Four candles […]
Posted on April 2nd, 2008 by Tiff
Filed under: Group Writing Project, Loss of a baby, celebrations!, grief, hurting | 31 Comments »
It’s taken four years for me to reach this point in the grieving process. Four years of self blame, four years of doing what everyone thinks is right, the right way to behave, the right way to grieve. I have listened and adapted to people’s differing points of view as to how one should grieve. How […]
Posted on March 31st, 2008 by Tiff
Filed under: Loss of a baby, Love, grief | 22 Comments »
You know those days?
The days where the breeze plays softly on your face and the sky is amazingly azure in colour.
Perfect golden apple days, so crisp and clean.
Days when you can feel that change coming, days where old memories whirl around you, kissing your cheeks with tears of rememberance.
With the change of season comes the focus […]
Posted on March 3rd, 2008 by Tiff
Filed under: Loss of a baby, grief | 14 Comments »
