Once upon a time,
in a land not so far away (well, far away for some of you),
lived a princess named Ivy.

She ruled the land with a fair and even hand.
Okay, she didn’t really
and the people of the land would argue with the above statement
until they were blue in the face
but
it sounded good.
Anyway,
the princess declared that the castle be decorated
as Christmas was near.

So all of the pretty, shiny ornaments were pulled from the royal shed and the tree dusted off
and the abode suitably decked out in all things celebratory of the season.

It was beeee - you - ti - ful.
There was a mystery in the kingdom though.
Two of the ornaments were often missing.

Two wire trees.
Often the royal servants would find them hidden somewhere
or
trip over them.
One day
a chamber maid discovered it was the princess removing the trees.

The princess!

The chamber maid replaced them
but the little princess was often found carting them away again.

“but why?” asked the maid, confused.
“I just don’t luff the wobbly trees” the princess replied.

The chamber maid could not argue with that
and so there is no end to this story (at least not until the end of the Christmas season)
because
to this very day the wobbly trees still offend the little princess.
