My husband is not a silly man.

He is one of the most intelligent people I know.

He can build a computer from the ground up and knows an enormous amount of information about many things. Things that I could never hope to retain.

He has been listening to pre med lectures on his way to work each day and this morning he phoned me.

He called because he had just listened to a lecture about prednisone and the adrenal gland.

He phoned because he discovered the effects of the medication that our daughter has been taking for the last twelve months and for the first time he understood.

He finally got how serious this whole business is with Ivy’s health, the intricate balance of disease and medication. The long term complications of immune deficiency that we are now starting to see in our girl.

Our baby girl.

How life altering it all is.

It is one thing to have the knowledge but another thing entirely to understand.

He conceded that we are in a very scary place right now, with the pulmonary hypertension and the possible lung disease.

Don’t get me wrong. Dave has always been supportive but he felt he didn’t have a handle on everything until this morning.

My first reaction was to be defensive. I thought he was accusing me of not imparting with the information that I have been privvy to

then it was to laugh because it has taken him near on two years for the penny to drop

and now I just want to cry because for the first time he can see what I have been carrying. The pain and the worry that has festered away, the weighing up and making important decisions.

Now I feel as though he is walking with me.

It is a landmark day.

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PS; I’m writing over here today, you know, if you want share some extra love