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I’ll have the house salad, thanks.
June 3rd, 2008 by Tiff

Take one Mummy, confine her to the laundry.

Get into her ribbon stash (that another chef has neglected to pack away) and pull Every. Single. Ribbon from its roll and call it ‘pasta’.

Take scrapbooking cardboard flowers (hundreds of the little suckers) from the back room, sprinkle a few into the ‘bowl’ you have aquired from the plastics cupboard and the rest (read majority) onto the floor for creative effect(an important part of being a successful chef).

Shred rediscovered tissue paper, from birthdays past, into tiny little pieces and declare them ‘lettuce’. Place a handful into the bowl and the rest can go on the floor.

Mix heartily.

Present to Mummy in the laundry.

For added effect, try to stuff some of the ribbon ‘pasta’ right to the back of her craw, until she gags.

Proceed to sing The Wiggles ‘Fruit Salad’ (yummy, yummy) song at the top of your lungs (to drown out the tears when the Mummy discovers the aftermath) and ask innocently ‘What’s wrong, Mummy?’ when she falls to the floor sobbing.

After pretending to feed the Mummy the concoction for a large part of the morning, proceed to fight over lengths of  ‘pasta’ that you want made into tails, because you are now horses. (Of course it is vitally important that you both have the same piece of ribbon).

In true executive chef style, throw a hissyfit when asked to clean up your ‘creative’ mess.

This is how you make “house salad”.

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17 Responses  
Xbox4NappyRash (314 comments.) writes:
June 3rd, 2008 at 7:09 am

Such creativity, wonderful to see, should be encouraged if you ask me….

Widdle Shamrock (101 comments.) writes:
June 3rd, 2008 at 7:39 am

Awww, sounds wonderfully messy, yummy and fun.

Fiona writes:
June 3rd, 2008 at 8:07 am

Omg thats soooo funny!

Alison (3xkewl) (134 comments.) writes:
June 3rd, 2008 at 8:36 am

Can we come and eat at your house?
lol - very cute.

hbacmama (8 comments.) writes:
June 3rd, 2008 at 9:00 am

Excuse me?
What are you doing with my life?
And the clothes I lovingly hung up outside… taken down and trampled so as to wash them again… yeah, the joys are abound here too.
Raising a glass of something stronger than my iced tea to you later on tonight.
Cheers.

Mad Squirrel (3 comments.) writes:
June 3rd, 2008 at 9:13 am

What no picture? My oldest had a toliet paper fest when he was 2years old and it was not confined to the bathroom or to just one roll. Noooooooo, he found the 12 pack and while mom was doing homework he decorated the bath, hall, And 3 bedrooms. Remember that she tried to make you happy and what is more precious than a child trying to make their parents happy. Kiss her, hug her, and explain why we don’t do it again. Than go turn up some music and scream in the bathroom!

Suze (19 comments.) writes:
June 3rd, 2008 at 10:51 am

Sounds like an awful mess, but oh-so-creative and fun!

P.S. I’ll email you in a day or so about the background/upgrade thingy, and see if I can get it done this weekend - I have a couple of extra days off - woohoo!

Jayne (143 comments.) writes:
June 3rd, 2008 at 11:41 am

I want your chef!
Pasta that doubles as horse tails???
Brilliant!
You could make a fortune :P

Lightening (39 comments.) writes:
June 3rd, 2008 at 11:49 am

Very cute!!!! I can understand the frustration though. :)

Bettina (96 comments.) writes:
June 3rd, 2008 at 11:55 am

I bet it was a pretty salad though.

Kids, can’t live with em, can’t keep them tied up under the house ;)

Karen MEG (27 comments.) writes:
June 3rd, 2008 at 1:08 pm

Sounds like a very healthy salad :)

Krista (17 comments.) writes:
June 3rd, 2008 at 1:15 pm

At times it’s the combination of all the little things that make for the worst days. I hope tomorrow is much better!

Veronica (477 comments.) writes:
June 3rd, 2008 at 2:21 pm

I wonder how many calories it had…

river writes:
June 3rd, 2008 at 3:29 pm

Creative little buggers aren’t they? Wonder where they get that from? I’m truly happy that Ivy is well enough to play like this. I hope she stays that way for a while. For a loooooong while. Say about 60-70 years……….

frogpondsrock (211 comments.) writes:
June 3rd, 2008 at 9:11 pm

Ribbon Salad Yummy Yummy.

LMAO xxx Kim

Childlife (203 comments.) writes:
June 4th, 2008 at 7:17 am

Oh, thanks for the much needed laugh, Tiff! Where’s the photographic documentation? LOL! Hilarious! :D What I want to know is why the little stinkers typically insist on serving house salad AND house soup at the same sitting? Why? Why?? WHY????

P.S. (I know a little girl with a flair for peanut butter, if the salad didn’t fill you up… ;) )

Tracey (109 comments.) writes:
June 4th, 2008 at 7:51 am

What? No pictures? You call yourself a blogger. Ha!

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